Tuesday, May 10, 2011

That Old Feeling

Today was the first day since I was laid off that I woke up feeling stressed out. Now don't get me wrong, there have been other days I have felt anxious about various things. But today was the first day that I can recall that I woke up with that feeling that I have this 1,000 pound weight sitting on me and I don't know how to get it off.

Tonight is the class where I have to present a short story to workshop. And while I have the story finished it is nowhere near where I want it to be. I still have all afternoon to work on cleaning it up, which I will, but I can just hear the countdown clock clicking down behind me. We all have a bit of a delusion that writing is easy, but it really isn't. It is a time consuming process that takes a lot of effort. And never has that been more apparent to me than now. I am fairly confident I can get the story fleshed out and ready in time, but it is definitely worrying me. But I'm telling myself that the whole point of taking this class is to be a better writer and they aren't really expecting the story to be amazing and that I can only get better. So it won't be bad.

On top of all that though I also have a fairly socially packed week. I have class tonight, and then Thursday we have friends coming over to hang out a bit. And while that doesn't seem stressful, the problem is they are coming here which means we have to get the apartment cleaned and ready for visitors by Thursday. So that means cleaning on Wednesday and Thursday on top of the job hunting I need to do those days for my unemployment. And then Friday we have our gaming group, and Saturday we are going over to another group of friends for a little mini-party. And all that is on top of any writing assignments I'll have for my class. Yikes!!

Thankfully nothing is life threatening and all of it will be fun to do. It just feels like I won't have much time to do anything else. I do not miss this feeling of being stressed out. It is nice to be busy I suppose. Having a social life is better than not. I just wish it wasn't all crowded together like it is this week. Feast or famine folks, feast or famine. >.<

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